A long time ago, I came up with a very good idea for a movie. Picture this: a Big, GIANT 747, or whatever a really big airplane is (I'll get my brother to help with that part), stuck on the tarmac due to terrorist interference—they can't land and they can't take off or they will EXPLODE! And because this is such a big airplane, there are all sorts of shenanigans going off. A woman has a baby! An old man has a heart attack! And because I'm all about the humor in the face of tragedy, there will be a botched engagement proposal! And, of course, I'm going to call it Terminal Velocity. In fact, dear bleaders, I may have even blogged about this before.
Now, I know what you're thinking, and I hear you.
"But isn't there already a movie with that name?"
Well yes, but that movie didn't have the punny nature of taking place AT A TERMINAL.
"But isn't there already a movie with that plot?"
IT WAS ON A BUS, PEOPLE! Do you feel the same on a bus as on a plane? I THOUGHT NOT! It is not the same at all! Buses are stupid and planes are glamorous and that is why Terminal Velocity wins!
Well, I tried to tell this to some of my friends in the industry (they are writers assistants on tv sitcoms, which is so far from an actual connection I may as well be telling a bus driver, not that I ride the bus or anything. Like Stephen Colbert says, "I stand with Martin Luther King by refusing the ride the bus EVERY DAY."), and they thought it was a pretty stupid idea for a movie, no matter how many times I pointed out the really good pun.
So, like the dreams of generations of Women before me, I have shelved Terminal Velocity (for now) and am moving on to bigger and better things.
Which leads me to announce! (pretty anticlimactically, way down in the middle of the post)
I AM OPENING A RESTAURANT!
Ok, that might be a little optimistic, but I DO have a really great IDEA for opening a restaurant. Are you ready? BRUNCH TAPAS!
Don't you hate when you pop on over to your favorite brunch spot (Orange, Clarkes, Toast, Wishbone, Nookies, what have you, etc, etc, goodnight.) and are faced with that eternal dilemma: Savory or Sweet?? I don't want an ENTIRE plate of giant bigger than your head blueberry pancakes, or a 23495 egg omelet, or a vat of oatmeal or a tureen of fruit salad with yogurt and granola, all at $12 a pop! No, what I want is 1 egg benedict and 3 silver-dollar blueberry pancakes and a teacup of oatmeal and a single fruit kabab!
I WANT BRUNCH TAPAS!
And so, I'm going to open a brunch tapas restaurant. It's going to be so delicious and wonderful that it will SUCCEED even in this volatile economy. But, friends, what do I call it? Ideally, Sarah Beth's, but THAT HAS BEEN TAKEN! Then I suggested Blueberry, but ricky said he wouldn't eat there. He suggested Somplace, or Somewhere, which seemed a little vague but is par for the course from him, considering the names he has come up with for my various romantic dalliances (someone, everyone, one, and that one. And maybe there was a which one.)
Do you have any suggestions? I will give you credit on the menu, and maybe even name a tapas in your honor. Thanks, friends!
ooh that is a briliant idea. Here's a delightfully corny half-joking idea: "Tapa of the Morning"
get it? okay i will comment later if I get a real idea.
Posted by: Janet | January 30, 2009 at 12:28 AM
Good for people to know.
Posted by: Lucy | April 26, 2009 at 10:04 PM